Thursday, March 17, 2011

unconditional love

"Sometimes it's nice to go where everybody knows your name. And they're always glad you came..." Remember that from Cheers?

I used to visit the piano man regularly.

Sometimes I was the waitress, shuffling drinks to other lonely people. But mostly I was a customer, "sharing the drink we call loneliness to forget about life for awhile."

It is nice to be where they're always glad you came. Sometimes those places are hard to come by -- and I've been done with bars for a very long time now.

But we always have FAMILY and FRIENDS, who represent unconditional love. Those who keep loving you even when you mess up, when you go through weird stages, and when you lose your way. Here's a few. (I'm leaving lots out, as I don't have pics of everyone).

Aunt Lindy, Nani, and cousin Caleb

Uncle Butch

Pauline and Grandma

Grandpa and the boys

John and Mary Alice

Cousins Carter, Brennan and Rowan

Mama Darlene, Pauline, and Papa Richard

Marc & Nicole
Cousins Caleb and Esmae

Crosswhite Family

Cousins Keith & Mark, Aunt Sharyn & Uncle Steve

Freddy & Joanna

Mimi and Aunt Kim

I don't want to forget Aunt Tamara (pictured top right at top of blog), as well as Brandon and Brian, Laura and their family. :)


Linking to imperfect prose on thursdays.

in the hush of the moon

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

happy faces: a poem by me

Grant Wood, American Gothic (1930)
Art Institute of Chicago

Stone faces staring back at me
Not even able to hear
Stone faces staring back at me
Not able to shed a tear

Doing, doing, doing -- no time to be
Not much time to think or feel
Doing, doing, doing -- no time to be
Do you think they'll like your meal?

Afraid to hear the depths of another
You are present but not really here
Afraid to hear the depths of another
What would happen if I saw a tear?

It's who you are; you are what you know
Although you may not understand
It's who you are; you are what you know
You come from a foreign land.

Would like for you to visit my world
Show you what it's like over here
You've been too scared to enter in
Even though you are very near.

Stone faces staring back at me
Not even able to hear
Stone faces staring back at me
Not able to shed a tear.

by jimi ann

Linking to One Shot Wednesday, over at One Stop Poetry - Where Poets, Writers & Artists Meet...

Monday, March 14, 2011

our eyes give us away

"It's terribly amusing how many different climates of feeling
one can go through in a day."

~Anne Morrow Lindbergh

It's always nice to end the day with a smile.

For Sweet Shot Tuesday and Around the World on Tuesday.

Sweet Shot Day

fear of man

Frédéric Bazille
Young Woman with Peonies , 1870
Collection of Mr. and Mrs. Paul Mellon
National Gallery of Art, Washington, DC

"Because people are defective does not mean they cannot see your defects. They see your fears, the contradictions, and your weaknesses. When they see them, they judge them. They assume an interpretation that may have nothing to do with what is really going on...people will criticize...When you are, as I was, unclear, unfocused, and sensitive to criticism, it will cripple you. You will become defensive. You will eventually say or do something that appears to support what people have judged to be wrong with you. If you react, or try to defend yourself, that's when they will get you." ~Iyanla Vanzant

"God is on my side;
I will not fear:
what can man do unto me?"
Psalm 118:6

Linked to Sunday Citar.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

going back to go forward

"Sometimes a person has to go back,

really back --

to have a sense,

an understanding of all that's gone to make them --

before they can go forward."
~Paule Marshall

This is my great Aunt Frances.

Linking up with Imperfect Prose over at Emily's today.

in the hush of the moon

Monday, March 7, 2011


"What I've discovered is that most tears

come from our inability to tell our story.

One of my teachers once told me,

'Tell your story. Your story will heal you,

and it will heal someone else.'"

~Iyanla Vanzant

Our story is who we are -- who we were, and who we've become. Our story is where we are, and how we got here.

# # #

The daffodil above is one of my favorite shots from this week, also the two photos here. (Couldn't pick just one!).

For Sweet Shot Tuesday and Tuesdays Around the World.

Sweet Shot Day

Sunday, March 6, 2011

a time to pause

"The notes I handle no better than many pianists.

But the pauses between the notes --

ah, that is where the art resides.

~Artur Schnabel

Today is a glorious rainy day. I love the rain -- it cleanses, refreshes and renews -- and prepares the way for the sun. Sunday -- a perfect day to pause.

Linking up at Sunday Citar with Tabitha.

Also Sunday Snapshot with Stefanie.

Ni Hao Yall

Friday, March 4, 2011

faulty memory

I had a dream lastnight that I wanted to remember but can't. It held some special meaning that I remember wanting to remember when I woke at 3am. I should have jotted it down like I said I was going to do instead of relying on my memory. I even keep a notepad and pen on my nightstand so when I wake with a thought or something I know I need to do, I write it down, in the dark, usually illegible.

My sister Kim says both our brains have organic brain damage (self-inflicted, of course). She's probably right. Remember the dopey guy, Jim, from Taxi, played by Christopher Lloyd in the 70's? Yeah, that's what I'm talking. (If you need a laugh today, click above and watch the video about Jim -- it cracks me up every time.)

I have to write everything down if I'm going to remember to actually do it. And then I have to remember to put it in an obvious place where I'll be sure to see it. Or else I need a visual reminder to carry with me until I do the thing, or else I forget.


If I'm cooking, I carry the spoon with me if I go into another room so I don't forget to come back and stir it. When I'm doing laundry, I have to put little notes here and there so I don't forget about the pants in the dryer (I like to fold them right away to avoid ironing).

Maybe some of it is organic brain damage, as my sister calls it, and maybe part of it is what happens when you're approaching 50 and still have children at home all day. Not a good mix.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

on self-worth and comparison

It's a well-known fact that sometimes we find too much of our worth in our work.

File:Hay Harvest at Éragny by Camille Pissarro 1901.png
Hay Harvest at Eragny, Camille Pissarro 1901
National Gallery of Canada, Ottawa, Ontario
Source: Wikipedia

We find it difficult to not measure ourselves or "prove" ourselves worthy by how busy we are and how much we get accomplished. A sure sign is when we start telling others they need to do more too, or do it better, or judging them because they're not living up to our standards.

Life becomes one big balancing act that teeters on a very thin rope, ready to fray and send us spiraling down any minute. We don't face it and stop our denial, and it oddly propels us to go even faster. More caffeine, please!

File:Lise Sewing - 1866.jpg
Lise Sewing 1866, Pierre-Auguste Renoir
Dallas Museum of Art

Some women seem to have it all together. The key word is "seem."

It's important for me to remember that the part of someone else's life I see is all I see. And it's usually a very small part.

Young Housewife, Oil on canvas.
The Russian Museum, St. Petersburg, Russia
Source: Wikipedia

"You can live a lifetime and,
at the end of it,
know more about other people
than you know about yourself."
~ Beryl Markham

I think maybe an accurate addendum to the above would be, "think we know more about other people..." All I see is all I see.

I want to be a true friend who accepts others where they are, and be there to support and encourage them on their journey when they need it. Not give un-solicited advice telling them they need to be like me, or tearing them down instead of building them up. A fine line sometimes. I know I need help in that area. And admitting is the beginning of growth.

Join Emily and others at Imperfect Prose on Thursdays. You have GOT to read her post from today on "Boys with Clown Noses." Get your box of tissues ready.

in the hush of the moon

Wednesday, March 2, 2011

living in gratitude

"Only when we are no longer afraid
do we begin to live in every experience,
painful or joyous,
to live in gratitude for every moment,
to live abundantly."

~ Dorothy Thompson

I came to the realization that I was trying to live out other people's ideals.

It had less to do with God, and more to do with other people's perceptions of what they think God wants and what they personally think is the only way.

Self-deception. It's so natural and easy to live in denial.

The fear of man.

"God is on my side;
I will not fear:
what can man do unto me?"
(Psalm 118:6)

Emily at chatting at the sky talks about grace for the good girl here.

I was a good girl gone bad, then I was trying to be "good-er" than good, and now, well, now I'm just trying to be real and genuine. Some people have farther to travel than others.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

don't forget to breathe

George, my baby boy who's not a baby anymore.

I've previously posted this under a different title, but wanted to share it for Sweet Shot Tuesday today. It remains one of my all-time favorite poems. It's by W. H. Davies, entitled Leisure.

"What is the life if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.

No time to stand beneath the boughs
And stare as long as sheep or cows.

No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass.

No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night.

No time to turn at beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance.

No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile that her eyes began.

A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare."

My sweet daughter, Pauline.

Take a deep breathe. Exhale. Notice life.

Sweet Shot Day