ships in distress

Ships in Distress off a Rocky Coast Ludolf Backhuysen 1667

National Gallery of Art, Washington, DC

Do we really live? Or merely exist, enduring from day to exhausting day? While what I do is important, what I am is more important.

Do I have energy saved up for my relationship with my spouse or close friends? Or are we like passing ships in the night on a dark and lonely sea? Do we hear the distant horn, the distress signals of our friends, families, neighbors and others, but aren't able to see the other ships through the fog of our own busyness?

Nach dem Tornado 1899 Winslow Homer
Art Institute of Chicago
Source: Wikipedia

When I'm feeling burned out, I need to ask myself: How is my inner life? My relationships? Are they deep and passionate and true? Have I taken the time to make them so? If we're mothers, how are our families? Our husbands? Are they calm and contented? Or as frazzled as we are? As a wife and mother, I set the tone for my home.

Do I have time for God? For solitude; to calm my anxious mind? To breathe deeply and be grateful for every breath.

At night, if we have children, do we try to get them to bed fast so that we can get more done and drop dead in our beds from sheer exhaustion? Or have I paced myself and taken care of needs so that I'm able to relax, savor and enjoy my children, building deep and lasting bonds? If it's not the latter, then I know I need to cease striving and reevaluate what I'm doing and why. "Busyness is the enemy of spirituality, as I shared here.

Sometimes, though, when in distress, we have to be forced to reevaluate. We had the minister and his wife at our old church stop by our home one afternoon. They were upset with my husband and I because we weren't filling their expectations of attending both back-to-back church services one Sunday. We only attended one. Instead, we had chosen to take a meal to a very sick family, after seeing off out-of-town friends that we had hosted for the weekend. Then we needed to take the time to rest and recover from our busy weekend with guests. I share this to make the point that others won't always agree or try to understand our choices to not participate in their agendas, but we still have to follow God's leading, like we did that day. They were very unhappy with us -- but we knew we did the right thing.

Consequently, that confrontation ended up being a blessing in disguise, as the minister's wife brought out a lot of other issues she had with my husband and me, which we hadn't known were busting at the seams. She pushed us to take a long, hard look at our lives, our choices and our walk with God. Sometimes we need that extra shove. God used that incident to bless us with our current situation, and we learned a huge lesson about freedom. We hadn't been listening to that inner voice, so the choice was made for us. For that, we're grateful.

So...we needed to listen to that still, small voice within us; instead of the shouting of other people. That still, small voice instead of the foghorn.

That said, we had to let go of some of ours, and mostly, others' expectations. It's not always easy. But, we trade the better for the best. "Best" may not seem so to others, and that's okay -- it's in the eyes of the beholder.

Disclaimer:

"We teach best what we most need to learn."
~ Richard Bach

Grateful for ANCHORS

It's Monday morning. I hope you all had a good weekend!

I'm grateful for a wonderful weekend, albeit a very busy one. Yesterday was great, the meal turned out well, and we had a very nice time of fellowship. We ended up having 38 people here!



Today I'm happy to wake up looking forward to a quiet, "normal" day. Over 12 hours of people, people, people! Although it's fun and needed, it's exhausting.

I'm extra grateful that tonight we've been invited over to another family's home for the evening meal. A little quieter tonight since it'll only be us and them. And, we get to enjoy someone else's labor of love! Yay!

Today we'll straighten up the mess a little, do some schoolwork, and drop those anchors back down.

Anchors are things that we instill in our day that keep us grounded, so to speak. I learned this from Dr. Raymond Moore, one of the early homeschooling pioneers, who wrote a lot of eye-opening books, one being "Better Late Than Early." Anchors are times in your day that you and your family can count on happening. They bring a sense of order.

Some anchors could be:

Breakfast at 8am
Chores
Lunch at noon
Afternoon Tea/Quiet Time at 3pm
Afternoon Chores
Dinner at 6:30pm
Family Time in the evening
Tuck in and prayer before bed

Very simple, ordinary things. Some days even just meals and bedtime at the expected time bring a sense of order and peace to a family. When the children can count on these times happening most days, they know what to expect and it keeps them a little grounded.

Obviously, we can't keep as many anchors down when we're not at home, or when special circumstances come up. And it's nice to have healthy diversions and such. But, for the most part, we try to keep our anchors down and the children are much more settled as a result. And when the children are settled and happy, the parents are more settled and happy.



Just a simple little thing that works. I'm grateful for anchors, especially our eternal Anchor, Jesus Christ, Who keeps us grounded even when we have no anchors of our own in place.

"Though the angry surges roll
On my tempest driven soul,
I am peaceful, for I know,
Wildly though the winds may blow,
I've an anchor safe and sure,
That can evermore endure."

For the complete lyrics to this beautiful hymn, click here. What do you think about anchors?

Join Brenda today at Garden of Learning for lots of inspiration on gratitude.

I've also linked up with Branch of Wisdom for "A Month of Thanksgiving" Visit there for help in counting your blessings!

Have a blessed week, friends. Please tell me about your weekend or upcoming plans for your week!

Busy-ness

(Photo by Jimi Ann)

"Busyness is the enemy of spirituality."

Do you fight the enemy of busy-ness like I do? Do you often lose the battle like I do?

This weekend we were around people 24/7, with people in and out of the house all weekend, a birthday dinner for my 9-year-old boy, my mother staying overnight, and other unexpected company. And to top it all off, Michael got a brand new very-meowy, scratchy, hyper, climby little kitty for his birthday. He named her Sandra. Sandra is a spaz. Very cute, but a spaz nonetheless.

(Michael with Sandra, the new kitty)

Sunday was just as busy. Sunday is supposed to be a day of rest, right? God rested. So I'm sure if He did, we need to as well. But, it doesn't always work out that way. There are still hungry people to feed, church houses to set up and clean, dishes to wash. And we went to the hospital to visit a sick neighbor. All good and needful things.

We got home from church and visiting and it was almost suppertime already. Ughhh..... Just as I plopped down to rest and put a cold compress on my burning eyes, the phone rang. An invitation to a friend's home for popcorn, snacks, and fellowship. I REALLY wanted to go -- I love visiting this family, and my children love playing with their children, and my husband loves visiting with her husband. But I had to just say no. I know my limits. When I feel like an old wet dish rag, I just need a little solitude and rest. Ever feel that way?

(Photo by Jimi Ann)

Jesus went away to be with the Father. He had to go away from people. But the people even followed Him! Not just a few people, but multitudes.

So my husband and the children cheerfully went without me, and everyone was happy.

I'm learning that it's okay to say no. Especially when there's something else we need to say yes to. But it's all about balance. There's a time for everything under the sun. A time to be busy, and a time to not be busy.

Sometimes we need to stop running. Seems everyone's a sprinter these days. And lots of marathon runners. That was me this past week. Don't get me wrong, sometimes runners are needed to fulfill the many needs in the world. All the more reason that we need to be rested and ready for those times. I remember going to a Jackson Browne concert in the 70's as he sang about Running on Empty (Click it to hear). I want to run on a full tank, don't you? Are you running on empty?

(Photo of our dirty van by Jimi Ann)

Psalm 3 says, "Commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still." Solomon said in Ecclesiastes, "I communed with mine own heart...had gotten more wisdom...yea, my heart had great experience of wisdom and knowledge."

This means we need times of stillness to gain perspective, knowledge, wisdom, and just plain rest for our tired and weary selves. I'm a better wife and mom when I take time with God to be centered.

(Me)

Today is Monday. I rested well lastnight. New day. New week. New perspective. Now I'll stretch real big, take a deep breath, and go seize the day, remembering to stop here and there and commune with my heart. And be aware of how God is trying to lead me today.

This is our school verse, which we have hanging in our school room to remind us to let God lead us throughout our day:

(Needlepoint by our Dear Aunt Lindy)

I want to hear how you combat too much busyness. Do you struggle with the enemy called busyness? Please leave a comment about your day!